Do you have commitment phobia? Lately, I’ve been curious about whether our lack of commitment, as a culture, isn’t so much unwillingness, as it is a lack of clarity. How clear are we about the commitments we make? Do we really understand the purpose of our commitments? Oftentimes, it’s easy to say we’re willing to commit to something, but without understanding why we’re committing, over time, it’s likely our enthusiasm for that commitment will fade. Although it seems like an overwhelming question at first, if you feel commitments are difficult for you to make, it might be worth taking the time to ask yourself: what is my life’s purpose?
Once a person knows their purpose, most individuals feel a natural urge to commit and take action toward it, but finding that sense of purpose isn’t always easy. Aligning with who we are requires tremendous honesty and self-awareness. Notice when you put blinders on, why you continue to wear them, and how they drive disconnections to your commitments and purpose. When you are confronted with a situation and seek to identify a course of action, take a moment to ask yourself, is this an act that truly aligns with who I really am? If not, don’t do it! If yes, chances are, you’re in alignment.
This month, I encourage you to write down a list of possibilities that answer the question of your life’s purpose. Write the list, and then narrow it down — again and again. Find a common thread or overall concept that you can reduce to a single word or two and hold that idea. Take time ~ days, weeks, months ~ to contemplate it. Be sure it truly reflects your values and resonates with who you are at the core of your being. If you are truly aligned with your purpose, you should have no problem saying yes.
Now is a perfect time to begin a new sadhana and answering the questions above should be a practice. Commitment is about saying YES to your purpose. I hope you will choose to engage with the answers you find as a means of committing to your community and those you love– but mostly, as a way of committing to yourself.